Friday, April 22, 2005

PSA for Students #2

Yes, laptops are wonderful things. No, they are not a necessity. You cannot stand in front of me and say you have to have a laptop to type your paper with fifteen empty PC's behind you and expect me to feel any sympathy for you.

No, I will not tell you when the next laptop is due back because that does not signify anything. Your fellow students regularly return them early and late. I have checked-in laptops with as much as a $65 fine, and students have returned them after as little as ten minutes of use.

If you want a laptop, you must wait for one. Waiting is standing near the desk and watching for someone to bring up a laptop. Waiting is not sitting at a computer, putting on headphones, and playing games. Waiting is not standing at the other end of the floor joking with friends. Waiting is not going to another floor and calling on your cell phone periodically to see if a laptop is available. If you tell me beforehand, you may go to the bathroom and remain in the queue, but if you go to the bathroom without telling me or spend more than fifteen minutes in the can, I will not hold a laptop for you.

No, I will not remove late laptop fines. You know the rules. You signed a contract. I will go and find the contract you signed if you argue with me, and I will become even grumpier because the contracts are not filed alphabetically but are just in a huge pile.

So to recap, wait by the circ desk for a laptop, do not bug me about when the next one is due, be mindful of when your laptop is due back, and we'll all get along fine.

That is all.



Anonymous Spike said...

ROFL. You should print that out and hand it to students and tap it silently and meaningfully. Or just wear a tee shirt that says 'don't shit me, I'm armed'.

8:44 PM, April 22, 2005  
Blogger Vampire Librarian said...

We do have a sign that defines what waiting is. It might even be more explicit that this post, but they don't read, which is beyond irony in a library.

7:06 AM, April 24, 2005  
Blogger Vampire Librarian said...

And I need to learn to proof read my comments a little more carefully. It should be "more explicit THAN this post". Oh well.

7:07 AM, April 24, 2005  
Anonymous Spike said...

LOL re proofing. I hate it when that happens.

You wrote:
"but they don't read, which is beyond irony in a library"

Totally. And I teach spoken English to people who don't listen. 'Twas ever thus.

5:36 PM, April 24, 2005  

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