Sunday, January 22, 2006

They Must Not Frequent the Library

Oh, I wish I'd been there to see this.

It's raining here at Library X so I couldn't go outside the front doors like I usually do to have a smoke because I didn't want to mess up my nice suede jacket. I go out to the covered loading dock which is down a floor and through a locked door and is shared with the student center/dining hall.

As soon as I light up, a fire truck comes rolling up with lights flashing. Three firefighters get out and walk up and ask me what's the quickest way to the kitchen. I point in the general direction at the student center. I really don't know, but I figure they'll meet someone quick enough. A person in a dining hall uniform comes out after the firefighters disappear, and I ask her if they called the fire dept. She says they did, and she told the firefighters where to go. Being consummately nosy, I ask what the emergency was. I'm thinking grease fire, or maybe someone got cut with a knife.

She tells me, "Five kids were playing a game to see who could stick their hand through a hole in a chair. One student got his hand stuck. We tried icing it and greasing it to get the hand free, but nothing worked. I told them to stop before they broke his hand and called the fire dept to cut him loose."

I stare at her. My mouth may be hanging open. "These were university students?" I ask because I really cannot believe this.

"Yeah, they're always doing stupid stuff like this. We've got to call the fire dept or someone at least once a semester to get them out of trouble."

"But that's so stupid," I say still disbelieving.

"Yeah, but I guess he won."

Now I have the burning urge to go through the library and make sure we have no chairs that students could wedge their hands in and get caught. Maybe I should child proof all the outlets too while I'm at it.



Blogger Inexplicable DeVice said...

How irresponsible!

Of course, you could be equally irresponsible and wait for two or three of them to have rammed their hands into large unwieldy objects and then set off the fire alarm.

Or release a tiger into the library. That'd teach them.

4:23 PM, January 23, 2006  
Blogger Spike said...

ROFLMAO. I'm sure we'll see some of these drongos on Darwin Awards soon.

2:14 AM, January 24, 2006  
Blogger MadameBoffin said...

haha - and they're the future of the world! You should also make sure that the security rails for stairs, etc don't have large gaps between them - sounds like one of them will try and put their head through it! ;)

12:26 AM, January 25, 2006  
Blogger Fuckkit said...

No no no, what you should do is make sure there are many many things for them to stick their fingers into. It could provide hours of entertainment during those long nights :)

6:38 AM, January 25, 2006  
Blogger Nike said...

I'm in favor of cutting things off. Hands, ears, feet, tongues.
You only have to it once. Okay twice. The message gets through right quick.

10:17 PM, January 28, 2006  

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