Me, Paranoid?
I don't get what the big deal is. If we're going to redesign the main floor of the library, let's do it right. I want clear sightlines, no nooks and crannies, only four computers for community members to be able to access and they have to STAND to use them, a security station, attack dogs, ceiling mounted lasers, retina scanners, a helivac landing pad on the roof, and better staff chairs. What's the problem?
posted by Vampire Librarian at 2:31 PM
8 Comments:
Just ban the patrons. Then the work is so much more pleasant.
LOL. I'm loving the ceiling-mounted lasers.
You forgot the muscled guys fanning you with leaves. Tsk!
Don't forget the Library Policemen and the Book Gnomes. Oh, wait, Book Gnomes are no good. They do bad things in the library, but if you train them and treat them well they may be able to do bad things to the patrons if you'd like them to. Book Gnomes are scary-- I know, they inhabit the bookstore I work in.
A cookie to whoever guesses which three items I actually requested.
In the past, I just asked for tasers. That's why it's not on the list. Knew it wouldn't happen.
Snooze, banning patrons just wouldn't be sporting.
Lee, well what can I say. You always remember what I forget.
Oh, and disgruntled, I have not encountered these book gnomes. I'll take your word on their ferocity. Training gnomes sounds tricky though.
No, no, no! You need a pool of sharks with head mounted lasers! Everyone knows that!
Just have drag queens there to attack and verbally assualt any patron who does something stupid (which will more then likely be any patron at any time, anywhere) that is more fun for the worker anyways.
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